Obama was in town yesterday to sign his stimulus bill. This victory, the first great moment of the Obama administration, was a hard-fought one earned in the face of fierce opposition from fiscally responsible Congressional Republicans. These staunch guardians of the American purse strings have proven, time and again, their willingness to combat wastefulness and ill-advised spending by…
Wait a second. Back up.
A couple weeks ago I saw one of these miserly GOP types on the TV railing against fiscal recklessness, and it’s not hard to find more just like him. Take this article, for instance, from a couple weeks ago.
Updated 1/29/2009 4:39 PM
By John Fritze, Richard Wolf and David Jackson, USA TODAY
WASHINGTON — A group of conservative Senate Republicans vowed Thursday to vote against an $888 billion economic stimulus package when it comes up for a vote in the Senate.
“A trillion dollars is a terrible thing to waste,” said Sen. Roger Wicker, R-Miss., standing with Republican colleagues who said they feel shut out of the process of crafting the stimulus despite Democratic promises of bipartisan cooperation.
As I recall, the GOP did in fact vote a damned-near perfect straight party line.
Ummm. Wow. I mean, yeah, we’d hate to waste the taxpayers’ money. That’d be just awful. I mean, shucks, money don’t grow on trees. Where the heck are we going to find billions and billions of dollars?
How about here, you hypocritical fucknozzles!! $597,74+,+++,+++ and the meter is spinning so fast that if you hooked it up to a ceiling fan you could refrigerate the entire length and breadth of Hell.
But wait – that’s a conservative estimate. A very conservative estimate. The better number is in excess of three goddamned trillion dollars!!
I guess we could review the record line by line, vote by vote, doubletalking son of a bitch by doubletalking son of a bitch, but that would just make us mad. So let’s just work with the topline: “Like most of the remaining Republicans in the Senate, Wicker voted with Bush every time a bill dealing with the occupation of Iraq came up.”
There’s lots more fun stuff in the USA Today article linked above.
“This is about spending money that we don’t have for things we don’t need,” Sen. Tom Coburn, R-Okla., said Thursday.
Like a 100-year presence in Iraq?
The cost of the economic stimulus package rose to $888 billion in the Senate because of a $70 billion addition to protect about 24 million Americans from paying higher taxes under the alternative minimum tax.
Alternative Minimum Tax? Wait, where did this amendment come from?
“This was not a stimulus bill. It was a spending bill,” Rep. Eric Cantor, R-Va., the GOP whip, said Wednesday.
Because what we need is a real stimulus. Like maybe invading Iran.
“I haven’t ruled out voting for it,” said Sen. Judd Gregg, R-N.H
No, he didn’t “rule it out” until later. In related news, I haven’t ruled out flying to Mars using the magic of nipple power.
I’m sorry. I promised I wouldn’t get emotional. But knee-buckling displays of hypocrisy agitate me. In fact, the whole fetid affair has me contemplating fiscal responsibility myself. For instance, which would be a more efficient use of taxpayer funds?
- continue paying the salaries of every Congressweasel who voted aye on Iraq but nay on the stimulus package due to concerns about financial prudence
- take that money, use it lather them all up in scalding tar, coat them with feathers and roadkill fur, and shoot them into the Potomac with a giant rubber band
As the late Dr. Thompson might suggest were he still with us, these swine should be fucked, broken, and driven across the land….